I didn’t expect to live long enough to see 30 (I’m almost 36 and I’m fucking TIRED’T), let alone in the last few months get to take my friend’s trans teenage son to see an all trans punk band and march thru the streets with trans families for trans rights.

Shit looks really bleak when you look at the news and engage on social media, but this is something I didn’t have at all growing up–especially in Nashville, TN. A lot of Gen X queer and trans folks died of AIDS, or could not be visible.

I get to show up for my community in ways my elders couldn’t always for us, and provide the harm reduction for them that I also never had.

I rarely write much on days like this because I spent years suffering and dysphoric, not understanding what I was going through, and it was hard to think about.

But this is my first awareness day post op, 7 months, and almost 2 years on selective androgenic drugs because I wanted to use my drug knowledge to experiment with a different hormonal transition using research chemicals. Not only does it work, but my body is healing so well from surgery it’s blowing all of my doctors’ minds.

In all my loud and proud queerness and transness, I often still feel invisible. The algorithms block, delete, and constantly ban me and my content, and hundreds of followers lurk completely checked out. It makes me question why I even bother.

Then a trans person who quietly follows me online stumbles upon me in person and is really grateful for the content and I’m reminded that it’s all for us. So as long as I’m reaching my people on this godforesaken platform, that’s all that matters.

Also, you should check out the posts I wrote for @nextdistro and follow them.